Pick up lines for Physicists, from my Daughter


Top 50 Physics Major Pick-Up Lines

  1. Hey baby. It’s massive. You know what I’m talking about.

  2. What’s your resonance frequency?

  3. Your lab bench, or mine?

  4. Don’t you hate it how the coyote always remains suspended in midair until he looks down? It’s just SO misleading.

  5. Your eyes have a perfect wavelength of 563.4 nm.

  6. Wanna couple our equations tonight?

  7. I’m attracted to you like the Earth is attracted to the Sun-with a large force inversely proportional to the distance squared.

  8. Might I integrate your curves tonight?

  9. I’m hung like a Foucault pendulum.

  10. Two large masses that are close together are supposed to radiate gravitational waves. I think that you’re a big part of that.

  11. Einstein had great hair, didn’t he? I just love your hair.

  12. I know the spring constant for my mattress. Wanna take some data?

  13. I haven’t gotten laid in 4 years, 3 months, and 12 days, plus-or-minus 2 days. Would you care to check my error bars?

  14. What’s that great perfume? Vacuum grease?

  15. I love you. Please don’t turn away from me just because I’m a physics major. Oh, okay, I’ll leave.

  16. A freak lab explosion left me with this 16-inch penis.

  17. You’re more special than relativity.

  18. Those other guys said that your eyes shine like stars. But can they explain how they shine with equal brightness? Oh, okay. I’ll leave.

  19. Top quark or bottom quark?

  20. Bartender, bring this fine lady a Scotch and H2O. Hey baby, that’s just my way of saying Scotch and Water. You like?

  21. That dress would look even better accelerating towards my bedroom floor at 9.8 m/s2

  22. Yes I do like to move fast. My style is like a 10 GeV accelerator. Do you like my style?

  23. I have E=mc2 tattooed on my ***. Wanna see?

  24. I have e=nhf tattooed somewhere else. Wanna see?

  25. Wanna dance? I can really put your inertia in motion.

  26. Most women are so complex. They’re always like"i! i! i!" But you- you’re just so real.

  27. Let’s exchange fermions!

  28. Even the O2 you exhale is fiz-ine!!!

  29. I might be a physics major, but I’m no Bohr in bed.

  30. Can I have your significant digits?

  31. Hey baby, what’s your sine?

  32. Heisenberg was wrong. I’m certain about what you’re doing tonight.

  33. Wanna expand my polynomial?

  34. Like the ideal vacuum, you’re the only thing in my universe. No, it’s alright, I’ll just go over there.

  35. You and Me = Grand Unification

  36. I saw your empty valence shell from way over there. Did I mention that my nickname is Sodium?

  37. My friends told me that I should ask you out because you can’t differentiate. Do you need math help?

  38. I’ll make you dinner. I’ll make you breakfast. But in between, we’ll have to have some dessert. And I’m a physics major.

  39. How much do you charge? My paper-grading job doesn’t pay a lot.

  40. Your smile is warmer than hydrogen plasma.

  41. Engineers don’t know the first thing about pleasing a woman. Friction alone can’t get the job done.

  42. My last partner wasn’t very stable. She spontaneously decayed last week and left me for a neutrino. Bitch.

  43. I could get you Roahn Winer’s autograph.

  44. How do you feel about group experiments?

  45. I got a pocket full of radium and my homeboys do too.

  46. Would a loser be able to recite pi out to 50 decimal places? Huh? Would he? Oh, okay. I’ll leave.

  47. In my bed, it’s perpetual motion all night long, baby.

  48. I swear I’m not a physics major.

  49. Does your skin feel burnt? Because I think you must have just fallen down from heaven, and re-entry would have caused some problems for you.

  50. You make me want to be a better physicist.
    If there are any comments, please refer to the number.

Hope this helps (although I can’t understand why? :wink:

I think your daughter is starting to have to much time on her hands again. :lol:

A friend of mine is a physicist at Argonne National Laboratory. I’ll make sure he gets this!


Oh, ok, I’ll leave. :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Very funny Will.

“Copernicus was wrong, you are the center of my universe.” :wink:

“What are your thoughts on vacuum testing my pendulam” :twisted:

“Is that a Cyclotron in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

Hiesenberg might have slept here.

But not t the same time as Pauli

Ha Ha Ha… - Einstein