How to cook a turkey

Step 1: Go buy a turkey

Step 2: Take a drink of whiskey, scotch, or JD

Step 3: Put turkey in the oven

Step 4: Take another 2 drinks of whiskey

Step 5: Set the degree at 375 ovens

Cup of Beer Step 6: Take 3 more whiskeys of drink

Step 7: Turn oven the on

Step 8: Take 4 whisks of drinky

Step 9: Turk the bastey

Alcoholic Beverage Step 10: Whiskey another bottle of get

Step 11: Stick a turkey in the thermometer

Step 12: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey

Step 13: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours

Bottle of Wine Step 14: Take the oven out of the turkey

Step 15: Take the oven out of the turkey

Step 16: Floor the turkey up off the pick

Step 17: Turk the carvey

Turkey Dinner Step 18: Get yourself another scottle of botch

Step 19: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey

Step 20: Bless the saying, pass and eat out!

How I prepare a Thanksgiving turkey:

Marry a really cook and let her cook the turkey. :slight_smile:


I brined mine overnight and then stuffed it with steeped apples and onions. Injected it with 2 sticks of melted butter, added 2 Sam Adams, wrapped tightly sealed in foil and put in the counter top roaster on 450 for 4 hours. Browned the skin with my map gas torch. :lol: Knife never touched it. Used two forks to “carve” it, literally falling off the bone. Moist and delicious. I’m stuffed, 5 o’clock is right around the corner. :wink: